Ingrown Toe Nails (The Cure)

I usually try not to show disgusting stuff on this page but it has come to my attention that some people are suffering unnecessarily! And this is still within the concept of "methods and practices", (a.k.a. the recipe method).

I only know this because when I was 12 or 13 I had really bad ingrown toe nails. I mean really bad!! Infected, oozing, red and PAINFUL ingrown toe nails. This was exacerbated by snotty nosed prepubescent little shits who, once they found out I had bad toes, would stomp on them.

So off I went to the doctor who said, no problem we will just remove the nail and it will grow back fine.

The phrase, "just remove the nail", in no way does justice to the horror and pain of a rusty old pliers and a couple of stiff yanks.

So after the screams and night sweats subsided, I waited for the nail to grow back like he said. But, unfortunately it grew back the same as it ever was. A painful oozing mess!

So I went to new doctor because the other ass wipe said he could try it again, for FREE! I may have been 12 and did not have a bunch of letters behind my name, but I wasn't as stupid as he was.

Well, this new doctor, who was intelligent and sensible, was familiar with the laws of cause and effect so when something did not work he would not continue doing it! He said that there was no need to remove the nail! Just put cotton under the nail and keep it clean and it will be better in a week or so.

I did that and he was right! It was about as close to a miracle as I have ever seen. Two weeks and you just press the cotton into and under the nail and it acts as a ramp to keep the nail from cutting into the skin and it allows it to heal and the the nail grows on the ramp until all is fine.

I have been doing this for about 40 years and I never had the problem again. Whenever it gets tender, I just stuff in the cotton.

I think you can follow the photos and I guarantee it will make your life better!

Try it and see.

***(Alternatively you can cut a "v' notch in the center of your nail and theoretically that will allow it to grow more toward the center. But I have found that to be a lie.)














Comments

Clay Club said…
Ewwwwwwwwwww! why don't you post this on your AARP blog instead?
Kari Weaver said…
We get the Best of the Web award with posts like this?!! I suppose it does fall under the heading of "exchanging ideas" and "sharing information", but um maybe too much information.
klineola said…
Thanks John, this is a concern for me at the moment because my thumb got infected! Next time I'll swing by your "office" for some treatment.
John Britt said…
Kline ,

You got the right idea. $220 and hour and Obama is working on a deduction.
John Britt said…
Where is the AARP blog Emily?
Joy Tanner said…
oh no you've gone too far jb
Kyle Carpenter said…
John, you are required to wear closed toe shoes at the MudFire opening....and sleeves.
John Britt said…
Next topic ...Bunion removal??
John, I don't care what anyone else says, I am 59 years old, and this is the first time I feel like there is hope that my toes may feel right. I must have gone to your first doctor's attending, because your story is my story, except none of my subsequent docs went to school with your subsequent doc, so I have just suffered painful pedicures.
John Britt said…
Nelle,

Put the cottom under the nail and sometimes I put alcohol on after it is in place to keep it clean. Then you have to be vigiliant because it may come out but keep at it and after a few days the swelling will subside.

I had to walk with the cotton for several months but ---pain free!!
John Britt said…
Anne Doyle asked me to post this:



First, i know now i cannot have very short toenails... cutting them too short allows
the edges to dig into the skin again...

2nd: when i cut them, i cut the outer edges at an angle and round them off... like
this / \ ...

and 3rd: if/when they get bad, i stuff teeny-tiny bits of cotton swab soaked with
tea tree oil (melaleuca augustifolia) under the corner edges... just getting the
nail scissors under the outer corner edge is a relief...

Hope it helps,

Anne Doyle
Anonymous said…
Hello, i dont unerstand why so many people think is this "too much information" or being disgusted with it. It assisted me greatly when i was having to deal with a minor toe infection that i had no success clearing. It works, and it will still work.

Medical information is allowed to be gross, because it allows us to understand fully the severity and gravitude some things can end up becoming. Would you rather see some doctor teach how you to do a self mammogram on a dummy with no real features, or would you rather a practiced female physician show you exactly how to do the SLEF-mammogram with her own breasts. Hell if i was a fat man afraid of developing breast cancer (because it runs in my family) i would be happy to watch that and be 100% sure instead of going to the doctor. sigh...